THIS MONKEY'S HITCHHIKERS GUIDE: TWEAKIN' TRUCKER

            I was lucky because I only had to walk two blocks west from where I had that old dude drop me. I had to shake off that encounter. I was about to try and hitchhike w truckers, surely I won't be harassed like that twice in a day I thought, but I had to remain resilient. I had to prepare myself for any curve ball now since they usually swung back like a boomerang on me. These guys are some characters, some damn strange road warriors that roamed weary and tired, tweakin' down the highway and gettin' paid. This was just the first trucker of three, Ronnie, he was a tweaker, the majority of truckers I believe have cleaned up do to the huge risks took if one failed a drug test, which most trucking companies by now do.
             Did Ronnie smoke or use in any form around me? No because he would of had to share and he knew that, and it was so dang obvious that he was flyin' a hundred miles an hour.  The first couple of drivers I asked to get a lift from refused because of some buillshit policy most companies had in place not allowing the truckers to have extra passengers unless it was approved ahead of time.  So at first I thought I was going to be out of luck one more time after having been turned down by the first few I'd asked. Then I came upon Ronnie and he immediately seemed cool and actually happy to have me on board.
      
          "Hell yea kid i could use the company. You just got that one bag, right?" he asked.
          "Yep. You are a headed south I am assuming?" I retorted.
          "Well as far as Oregon I am."
          "Thanks man. Seriously."

        Sleep was a treasure at this point and after he finally shut his mouth blabbing to me about all kinds of shit: weather ballons vs. aliens, lots of complaining about state troopers, which somehow transformed into an in depth overview he verbalized describing the different states' flowers. He was not only a tweaker but he was a hype artist, bullshitting as the authority on every subject he had going in his mind.  I finally faded back into a deep sleep that would make Rip Van Winkle jealous.  I hadn't slept indoors in a couple of days so that cab's chair was so comfortable and before I knew it we had made it to Oregon.  I thanked Ronnie for the ride and all the cigs' he had given me.  Just as the dope monkey I am I climbed out of that truck and within twenty minutes would climb right into another.